I Wanted to Buy Some “Burning Palms” but I Thought They Could Crumble

by Nicholas Robinson

So as you saw my newest review of Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides, you know that I am officially back for the summer (and hopefully the semester too but I can’t guarantee that) and that I have resurrected my columns.  Today is the 1st new issue of “This Week in DVD and Blu-ray”.  As I have also not kept up with movies on a whole (unless it came out in theatres in Jamaica and even then not that good either) I have not seen a single thing on my list today.  However, my opinion is what I would do at this very moment in time (i.e. Buy, Rent or Avoid).  So without further ado, here are my picks.

Buy It

As I said, I have seen none of the releases this week and even though one of them came close to me buying it blind, I cannot in good conscience recommend any of them to be bought.

Rent It

The Big Bang

I must say, the trailer for this movie had me hyped up to see this movie but for the wrong reasons.  The trailer looked REALLY bad but (in the circular scale theorem) bad enough that it breaks the circle and becomes really awesome, case-in-point 1989’s The Big Hit (WOW, even a similar title) starring our 2nd favourite rapper turned actor Mark “Marky Mark” Wahlberg.  So I shall DEFINITELY be renting this movie in the near future.

Blu-ray? Yes

Burning Palms

I almost would have bought this blind but too many trailers have fooled me so here it is in the rent section. Unlike the above entry, the trailer for this movie looked extremely good.  The last anthology horror film I saw was Trick r’ Treat in 2008 and this movie looks just as good if not better.  And if that wasn’t enough, the tagline sold me without a doubt: “Five tales that will fuck you up for life!”.  ‘Nuff said.

Blu-ray? Yes

The Great Dictator: The Criterion Collection

This movie will get a rent from me for several reasons.  Some of which include: Charlie Chaplin starred in it and I have been told he is one of the greatest actors in the history of film; it’s a satire about Nazis and Hitler (which in light of Lars Von Trier’s Nazi sympathising scandal would be a nice laugh); and it was nominated for Best Picture

Blu-ray? Yes

I Am Number Four

The trailer looked interesting, and it almost got on by Avoid list because my friend (yes I know you’re reading this and you KNOW WHO YOU ARE) likened it to Twilight but I shall reign in my hatred and watch this movie.

Blu-ray? Yes

Platoon [Blu-ray/DVD Combo Pack]

Ever since I have known about movies I have wanted to watch this film but due to strict parents and circumstances that involve a lot of forgetting, I am yet to complete this task.  However, now that it is on what one of my brother’s friends likes to call “The H-er D” I have no excuse and will once again put it on my radar to be watched.

Transformers: The Complete Series

When I was young (which actually wasn’t that long ago), reruns of this classic used to come on Cartoon Network along with G.I. Joe and I loved it.  However, I doubt that I would be able to watch all the episodes more than once due to the fact that I did not grow up with it properly and have therefore relegated it to the rent section.

Blu-ray? No

Don’t Touch With A 10ft Pole

The Royal Wedding: William and Catherine & William & Kate: Planning a Royal Wedding

Most people have looked at me in shock and amazement when they hear I didn’t watch this on BBC America when it occurred and I’m going to say the same thing here.  “Did I receive a handwritten/printed invitation in the mail and a ticket to London?  No, I Didn’t.  So why am I getting out of my bed at 3:00 in the morning to watch two people who I DON’T KNOW personally become man and wife?”  I shall add on to this by saying why would I now pay $4.99 or $8.99 to watch them get married and/or plan the damn thing over and over? IT MAKES NO SENSE!

Blu-ray? Who gives a rat’s ass?

Stuff I Don’t Know

  • Lemonade Mouth [DVD Only]
  • Childrens Hospital: Complete 1st and 2nd Season [DVD Only]
  • Public Speaking [DVD Only]
  • The Kids in the Hall: Death Comes to Town [DVD Only]
  • Transcendent Man [DVD Only]

~ by sputnikreviews on May 24, 2011.

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